14 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #13: Do you realize love after it's gone?

It was expressed,
In words and actions,
But hardly did I ever recognize it,
Value and appreciate I did,
But never understood how much it meant to me.

Chocolates and flowers,
I love you's and I miss you's,
Never did I pay much heed,
Till one day they ceased to be heard from you.

I don't know where things went wrong,
I don't know how to express my love for you,
I wish I could show you how much you mean to me,
But I don't know if a simple hug would do.

I love you in every possible way,
More each day,
Never move away from me,
Always this relationship,
I want to sustain,
For you are in my every happiness,
A pillar through every trouble,
And yes indeed,
My realms of perfection.

Blogathon Post #12: A Truckload of Memories, Life Lessons and Fun! :)

A day well lived is one where you have learnt something and enjoyed yourself. I feel like a took a step towards my goal yesterday and I had a blast with my friends!
Yesterday, my three friends and I went on a trip to Orient Flight School in Pondicherry. I got up at 4am, got ready and left home by 5:30am. Inspite of not being an early riser, I was so excited about the day ahead. I sent innumerable texts to my three friends and we were ready to meet at my college around 6:30am. I called up my best friend, who went crazy at being woken up at 6am, to come and collect my assignment and wave us goodbye! Well, I was about excited on meeting him at college so early and I felt happy about being a responsible student!
We left from college towards Pondicherry around 6:45am and the chit-chat started there! We chatted about many funny incidents from each of our lives, teased each other, binged on coca cola, biscuits and chocolates and had so much fun! We had a smooth journey till we reached a place called Marakannam. There was a strike going on there due to water shortage. We were supposed to reach the Flight School by 9:30am, but we were sure to be delayed due to the strike. We spent about half an hour waiting for the strike to get cleared, but when the police arrived, they insisted on giving protection to the strikers than clearing them. So we were forced to take an alternate route, which would add an extra 20kms to our travel! There were also speculations of bad roads, no sign boards and such. But, if you'd ask me, I'd say the journey through that area was tough, but the roads were not too bad. This obstacle added forty minutes to our already long journey.
The path of our journey, the sights we crossed during travel was beautiful. It was quiet and peaceful, breath-taking views and lots of lessons were learnt. We crossed around 33 villages in our course of travel. That lone temple on top of a mountain, the evaporation of sea water to produce salt, watching villagers pack salt to send to factories for purification, watching two mountains merge into a V-shape, coconut trees that grew in haphazard fashions at various angles (even 180 degrees!), the scars of a tsunami stricken village, the backwaters of two oceans, an estuary that had salt deposited on its sides, old people praying in small temples, the sound of children playing, the joy in children's eyes when they saw a car pass by, the roots of old banyan trees, trees whose leaves merged together to make it seem like you were under a bridge, the peeping of sunlight through closely knit leaves.. I can go on and on.
I have always associated villages to power cuts, water shortages, lack of amenities and such. But it was yesterday that my assumptions saw the truth. Yes, they suffered more troubles than the urban dweller, but their happiness was none short of blissful. You could see the innocence in their eyes, smell freshness in the air and the taste of a stress free life. You could see men laugh out loud, women gossiping, children playing, birds chirping, there was chaos. It was sublime, subtle chaos. Everybody seemed to have all the time in the world. Children went to their local school, men produced salt or maintained farms, women made local handicrafts. The charm exuded by the villages that I passed through made me see beauty in simplicity and love in hardship. Indeed, a valuable lesson learnt in the joy of just being alive..
After passing through many such places, we finally reached our destination at 10am. We finished all the formalities and the object of love for all four of us was in front of our eyes. An aircraft. A beast with immeasurable power. Analog indicators, digital indicators, six cylinder engines, eight cylinder engines, wow.. Four seater aircrafts that exuded power and class. We learnt the different types of flying and got to try our hand at it too! Amazing would not do justice to the experience that we had.
After spending about three hours there, the main purpose of the journey had come to an end. We were ready to leave, only stopping to have yummy lunch at a local restaurant. No sightseeing, for the journey had tired us. We had fun chatting and listening to music on our way back. It was a great day, one that will be in my box of memories forever. One that will probably hit me on the day I hold the joystick on starting my training again. One that will probably come back to me when I receive my commercial pilot license or when I make my first flight with a 'truckload' of passengers. My goal seemed distant and unreachable a few days ago, it seemed difficult and even scared me, it clenched my heart when I thought of what would happen in case I didn't achieve my goal. But now I know.. My goal is close by, a few more footsteps is all I have to take, a few more years is all I have to wait, for what is worthy of being achieved doesn't come easily.. You strive for it. :)
Yesterday's experience made me stronger and braver, happier and more grateful about all that life offers me. Now, I know why I am truly blessed; in happiness and joy, in fear and despair, in sadness and sorrow, I have many many things to hold onto.


Yesterday afternoon, I got a text from a friend with whom I hadn't been in touch for over a year. I was elated reading what the text said and made a mental note to truly make time to reach out to those who care about me.
The text said,
"It's been more than a year since we met and over six months since we spoke, but even today, when I hear someone laugh out loud, without inhibition, without worry, I think of you. Thank you for teaching me to laugh and be happy. I love you girl!"

I met this friend of mine when her life was at its worst. She taught me to see the beauty of life and I taught her to laugh her troubles away. When all we had wanted was each other's company, we had unknowingly taught each other life lessons that we would follow in the years to come. :) You'll never know what a person is worth, you'll never know how well you've lived life, but if you laugh and smile everyday; help a person genuinely, without expectations everyday, know that you lived your life well. :)


12 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #11: Small Beautiful Things In Life That I Love! :)

- Inside jokes between friends.

- Popping bubble wrap!

- Enjoying 'me time' without anybody bothering you.

- The fresh smell of the earth after a rainstorm.

- Waking up from a nightmare and realizing that it's not true.

- When you randomly get to know a nice person, who you enjoy talking to through a word game! :)

- The smell of really nice perfume.

- The smell of roasted coffee beans.
- When you sacrifice so much, work hard and get more than what you deserve.

- That long comfortable silence shared between loved ones.

- Star gazing.

- Talking with a friend who makes you laugh!

- Telling someone how much you appreciate them.

- Watching a baby sneeze.

- The simplicity of childhood.

- When someone is genuinely happy and proud of you and tells you so.

- Cookie dough!

- Chocolate ganache!

- When someone wakes up really early just to meet you for a few seconds.

- Love that has surpassed the tides of time.

- Excitement of swinging on a swing.

- Making plans for a trip that is months away.

- Pillow fights!

- A beach that connects two main oceans.

- An unexpected compliment.

- A photograph that takes you into past memories.

- The unique sound of the gate creaking when my Dad returns home after a long trip.

- Tears of joy.

- Making weird faces in the mirror!

- Bittersweet emotions on the last day of first year of college.

- The sound of the thunder, the flash of lightning and the smell of rain to remind you of the beauty of nature.
- Waking up, realizing it's weekend and falling asleep again.
- No morning days, when you wake up after 12pm.
- Hugs!

Life is shorter than you think. You never know if there really is going to be a tomorrow. Do what you can do tomorrow today. My best friend promised to listen to me narrate the whole episode of my first flying experience. It's my first flying class tomorrow and he's no longer around. I lost him to cancer, when he was only 19.  It's a very emotional moment for me and I miss him like hell. Sixteen years of laughing unnecessarily, sixteen years of making goals and dreams, sixteen years of finishing each other's sentences. Its been six months now, I've learnt to live life large without him. But that void in my heart? Oh, that will never be filled. Life live when you've got the time to live it.

Blogathon Post #10: Aahatein. ♥

With every step that you take,
The closer you come towards me,
The feeling of satisfaction,
The desire to achieve,
The beauty of winning,
For I am the GOAL you seek.

With every breath you breathe,
You pray and wish,
For better things indeed,
Every turning moment,
I'm unnoticed, but by your side,
For I am HOPE indeed.

With every tear that drops,
With every pit in the journey of life,
Whenever you feel that you've been pushed down,
Remember,
I only motivate,
For I am FAILURE that drives you forward.

With every song that you hear,
In my praise,
For every moment you think of me,
But fail to notice my presence,
Be certain that I'm always by your side,
Protecting and guiding you,
For I am the LORD you pray to.

With every kind act you do,
With every happiness you perceive,
With sadness and joy I fill your life,
Ups and downs I provide,
To life,
For I am the LOVE in the relationships you cherish.

For life is lived,
By every FOOTSTEP you take,
Towards everything you need,
Towards everything you want,
And ingrained it shall be,
In your heart,
Just like FOOTSTEPS in wet cement.


P.S: This is a part of yesterday's blogathon. I'm undergoing a lot of stress lately and as usual, have lost that fine thread called 'balance' that keeps my life in one piece! 
And to those who don't know Hindi, Aahatein means footsteps! :) 


Seeking forgiveness,



10 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #9: Is home where you live or is it where your heart is?


Why is it that my throat chokes and my heart aches when I have to leave Dubai? Why doesn’t it happen when I go on a vacation to any other place? Why do I crave to go back there and lead that high-comfort, luxurious life? Why do I miss the infrastructure, the cleanliness and the high-end life? Well.. Is that all I miss? Do I really miss the place because of what it is?  Or do I miss the place because of the memories it contains? It is the place where I spent my childhood. Eight years of a blessed, fun-filled childhood.  It is the place where my Dad works. It is him I miss. It is the memories I have with him and my loved ones that I miss.
Dubai is a special place to me. It is closest to my heart.  My heart swells with happiness and pride when I see how much the place has developed. Yes, this is not my hometown. This is not the place where I was born. It is not here my roots belong. But this is the place that adopted me when I was a kid. It is here I started to discover the world. My world. I made my first friends here, pushed across boundaries, discovered my capabilities, succeeded in academics, refined my leadership skills, sailed through obstacles, stuck to my culture, yet also adopted to a new culture and background. 
Dubai has taught me the value of friendship, truth, freedom and definitely, fun! It laid the foundation for my character and attitude. The people around me and of course, I am solely responsible for who I am today. Dubai taught me to enjoy and try new things (especially at Al Hashmi building!). It taught me to take certain things lightly and others seriously. It defined ‘me’.
As I left Dubai, I left a part of me behind. A part that will live in people’s memories. All of us have touched many people’s lives and left a mark in their memories. So have I.
Dubai will always be my world; the land that defined me and taught me so much that can never be listed. Dubai will always be equal to my friends, family and loved ones. Dubai, you are my first home.

Thank you Mom and Dad for all the experiences, memories and for molding me. 
Miss you Dad!
Love you both!


09 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #8: Do you crib or do you learn life lessons?

There have been days,
When the Lord has been far too kind,
Such that at the end of the day,
Grateful I am,
For all I experienced,
For all the happiness I felt,
For all the lessons I learnt,
And for the ways in which I grew.

Days I have been through,
When I felt that the world was conspiring against me,
That nothing more could go wrong,
Hit I had rock bottom,
And more often than not,
Succumbed to the pain of bad times.

It was on one such day,
When nothing went my way,
And tears welled up in my eyes,
That I realized,
A choice there was!
Events will happen,
Good and bad,
Face them or ignore them,
They will still exist,
But face them,
With a steel-iron attitude,
And bad shall be vanquished,
For in our attitude,
Lies victory,
And defeat too.

Every good day,
Shall be followed with a bad day,
It is not to ruin one's happiness,
It is not for Him to rejoice in your failure,
Or a moment to feel incapable;
A test it is indeed,
To see the level of gratitude you express,
To feel the strength you possess,
To watch you walk with your head held high,
And face the problem in the eye,
For the Lord shall never give thou,
What one cannot handle,
What one cannot withstand;
All you need to understand,
Is life is not lived in years,
Life is not lived by being merry forever,
It is lived day by day, minute by minute;
Creating memories when the time is right,
And learning life lessons when the time is 'wrong'. :)


P.S: I had a bad outlook towards bad moments in life. I could never fathom why things couldn't go my way all the time. It wasn't until my fifth grade teacher intervened, pointed out my mistake and gently explained to me what I doing wrong that I gradually changed myself. I love her for that. She is no longer in my life, but the mark that she left in it will never, ever go away. She will always be a part of my memories. :) Sometimes, people who are there with us for a season teach us more valuable lessons than those who are always with us, by our side. :)


Blogathon Post #7: A Quote.



"Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind."

Words motivate, they form and break bonds, they enhance the value of life. A few kind words have the potential to turn a person's life around. To cure bipolar depression and suicidal tendencies, the hope and faith required to live life is restored using words. The worth of a person's life is determined by the words he uses in his everyday life. If his words contain kindness, spread happiness and love, inspire and motivate, he has lived a life useful to people. Words can make or break a person. Choose your words carefully, for they form your sentences. Your sentences form your character, which makes you the person you are. Thus, words are definitely the most precious possessions humanity will have for eternity.

What are your thoughts on the quote? I'd love to know!


P.S: Nope, I didn't miss the blogathon. I reached home at 9pm, cause there was so much traffic. Four hours of travel in my dingy, college bus made me numb and tired as hell. So I got up at 3:30am to post! Wow.. I have a lot to complain about! My life is just.. weird. And sad.

 

07 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #6: Maggi in a Pressure Cooker? :D

Is it possible..
For the height of craziness to cross all horizons?
For a person to become so insane..
That simple cooking is forgotten?
If your answers are no,
Listen to this story!

I know this guy,
Madly insecure,
Or obsessed with his dreams,
I ain't aware,
But his height of craziness,
Unequalled and unparalled,
It shall remain,
In all future ages to come!

For he makes a two minute dish,
In a pressure cooker,
A task so simple,
Made so time bound,
Making me wonder if a lunatic he is indeed!

Sorry I feel for his daughter,
For she loves food,
But being bad at cooking,
She will have to tolerate,
The height of insanity,
Her father possesses,
And the chaos he is capable of creating!

For not even a five-year old will make,
Maggi in a pressure cooker,
Read the instructions,
Is the best advice I can give,
For I, myself am unaware of how Maggi is made!!


P.S: My body is in bad health. My mind is messed up. I can see how this reflects in my writing. Please bear with me for a couple of days, till I bounce back with good health!
This poem is fiction for the following reasons:
* I am a good cook.
* My dad is an amazing cook.
* I wrote this poem on 07th November, 2009. Please don't throw bricks at me after reading this poem; I was a kid back then!
 

Till I regain my sensibility,

 

06 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #5: An article that I love, read and reread as often as possible!

Life Without Labels: How to Rediscover the World


ladybug.jpg
 

“Everything, a bird, a tree, a simple stone, and certainly a human being, is ultimately unknowable”
 – Eckhart Tolle

Life is a miracle. And yet so many of us have become deadened to this simple idea. We mistakenly believe that because we know the word for items – a bird, a tree, a stone, a human being, etc – that we actually know these items. Nothing could be further from the truth. Even the most common everyday items hold unfathomable depth, which is why Eckhart Tolle says that they are ultimately unknowable.
Here is a test: stop reading this for a moment and take a look at your surroundings. Now, when you were looking around did you fully appreciate what was in front of your eyes? If, for example, you are sitting in your living room did you notice the details of the furniture? Did you consider the technology that makes your plasma television possible? Or, did you quickly scan your eyes around across the room and, in doing so, subconsciously attaching a label to each item (eg “chair”, “television”, etc)?
Most of us would have done the latter. And in doing so, we have covered up the mystery of life with a label. Of course this is pretty harmless in the simple example given. But consider for a moment if this is the way in which we always see the world. As Tolle says in his book A New Earth: “the quicker you are in attaching verbal or mental labels to things, people, or situations, the more shallow and lifeless your reality becomes, and the more deadened you become to reality, the miracle of life that continuously unfolds within and around you.”

Why “Rediscover”?

You may have noticed that I used the word “rediscover”, rather than “discover”, in the title of this article. The reason for this is that once, when you were a young child, you wouldn’t have covered up with world with words and labels. This is something you learned to do.
In many ways, living without labels is about seeing the world as a young child would. I have a 16 month old son, and I always find it fascinating to watch him play. Items that I usually don’t give a second thought to – a shoe, a plastic container, the television remote – fascinate him. He doesn’t simply attach a label to these items and quickly move on to something else. Instead he will pick them up, look at them intently and turn them over continuously in his hands. Tolle writes: “when you look at it or hold it and let it be without imposing a word or mental label on it, a sense of awe, of wonder, arrives within you.”
Another one of my heroes, Robin Sharma, once said: “children come to us more highly evolved than adults to teach us the lessons we need to learn.” I find a lot of truth in this comment. So if you find yourself struggling to appreciate the miracle that is life, take time to study children and learn from their natural wisdom.

Art, Science and Nature

Perhaps the best way to experience what I am writing about in this article is to go for a walk in nature. Don’t bother trying to identify what type of birds or trees you come across. In fact, try to avoid using the labels “bird” and “tree” at all. Instead, just be present in the moment and soak up the sights, sounds and smell of Mother Nature.
When we can begin to stop imposing labels, even the most ordinary of everyday items can regain their newness and freshness. If you want proof of this, think of how some of the world’s great artists – eg Van Gogh or Vermeer – approached the world. Vermeer, best known for his painting Girl With Pearl Earing, specialized in domestic interior scenes of ordinary life. Van Gogh was able to make ordinary items – eg the shoes below – come alive in his paintings.

van-gogh-shoes-mid.jpg

Another way to begin to experience the depth of everyday items is to appreciate the science or technology behind them. In his book The Pleasure of Finding Things Out, Richard Feyman writes:
“I have a friend who’s an artist, and he sometimes takes a view which I don’t agree with. He’ll hold up a flower and say, ‘Look how beautiful it is,’ and I’ll agree. But then he’ll say, ‘I, as an artist, can see how beautiful a flower is. But you, as a scientist, take it all apart and it becomes dull.’
I think he’s kind of nutty. […] There are all kinds of interesting questions that come from a knowledge of science, which only adds to the excitement and mystery and awe of a flower. It only adds. I don’t understand how it subtracts.”
As a final thought, the following is a quote from Buddha that relates to this topic:
“If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change.”

flower-and-bug.jpg



Peter writes about how to enjoy life at The Change Blog.
Images by Hamed Saber and Aussiegall.


P.S: I am unwell, as I have fever, cold and headache after a very very long and hard day at college. But I did not want to miss a day of my bloagathon. My drafts was empty and I was not in a state of mind to write, so I decided to post my favorite article that I visit, revisit, read and reread! :)

 

05 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #4: To Friendships!

This is a post that talks about random things, keeping in mind the day it is today. Friendship day!
So let's rewind, reminiscent, think, laugh and thank God for allowing us to choose the people who we call Friends.


5 things my best friends don't know about me:

* I have to ALWAYS walk on the left side, when I'm walking with someone! I get nervous and fidgety otherwise.

* I love to observe nature and people while travelling. I believe a person's character is revealed when he is surrounded by strangers.

* I want to travel the world alone. It's only when your alone that you pull out of your comfort zone.

* I love to cook. My friends think that I'm hopeless in the kitchen, which is untrue.

* I lose interest very easily. I get held onto a subject, only as long as there is some excitement in it.



5 memories with my best friends that I cherish:

* Watching and imitating the political history of Tamil Nadu (a trailer of 25 mins!) with a friend, when we went to watch Madagascar 3!

* Going to 3 Gangothri outlets in different parts of the city to taste chaat and determine which tasted best!

* Gossiping away to glory!

* Lazing away on a summer afternoon, sitting with a friend, taking in the beautiful sight and the silence. No words were needed, but the depth of the conversation was amazing.

* A trip to Kerala with my besties! The best week ever <3 p="p">

5 things I learned from friends for seasons:

* Such relationships will be lessons for life.

* Lying in a relationship is not a mistake; it is a choice.

* Sometimes it's best knowing why someone walked away. We are good enough to need an explanation.

* Life is full of fake people, who are insincere with their words and actions.

* People treat you the way you teach them to treat you.


5 qualities that my best friends have in common:


* Honest and truthful

* They know to have fun!

* Good listeners

* Thoughtful

* Loyal and always there for me.


5 things that I want to tell them today:

* Happy Friendship Day!

* Thank for being in my life and I hope you will be there forever.

* Everyday with you is a day well lived, worthy of being cherished, for it brings immeasurable happiness.

* Thank you for all the lessons that you have taught me over the course of our friendship.

* And last but definitely not the least.. I LOVE YOU!! :)


A message I sent to all friends I'm happy to have in my life: 

Crazy days and screwed up nights,
Tons of Crushes and stupid fights,
Secrets we will take to the grave,
Pictures we will forever save.
Through thick and thin,
Always true,
Friends we are,
Me and You!

Happy Friendship Day! :)


So what did you do today? Did you hang out with your friends, did you call them up or surprise them? Is your hand overloaded with friendship bands? And what is your perspective of friendship day? :)





04 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #3: The Joy Of Being Loved.

Fill me with warm emotions,
Wrap me in a blanket of joy,
Cuddle me tight,
Make me feel loved,
For my heart is a field,
Sowing seeds of the love you bestow on me.

Entwined hearts,
Knitted hands,
Silent charm,
Euphoric moments,
Experiences buried deep within,
Make me feel loved.

Squabble we do,
Nothing short of blows,
Arms folded across the chest,
Expressing displeasure,
Non-agreement,
But never did that make me feel unloved.

For ye are the one who fills my heart,
With happiness and joy,
Love and affection,
In turn making me feel loved.

Never once did you act,
In a way that would hurt me,
Never did you pierce my chest,
With unruliness or tactless language,
Consider you do my every emotion,
My heart you hold like a charm,
For the way you treat me,
Is like a princess,
Like a fragile glass that is priceless and precious,
Any heights you ascend to make me feel loved.

For love, my dear,
Is delicate,
Brimming with sentiments,
Passion and ardor,
Dedication and idolization,
Adoration and devotion,
Tenderness and warmth,
Compassion and benevolence,
Altruism and concern,
Inclination and disposition,
Zest and zeal,
Proclivity and predilection;
But to me, my darling,
Love is..
YOU and ME,
Surrounded by the credence,
That till eternity,
We will feel loved by the mere presence of each other.


03 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #2: Forever?

Forever.
That's what you promised.
I knew deep within,
How that would turn out,
But a smile I posed on my lips,
For forever was what I wanted.

Priorities.
You never did have,
I was always the one to understand,
That you were spent,
Without ever investing time on me.

Love.
Emotions I never experienced,
Tumbled in me,
Tossed me around,
And very often took the better of my logic.

Time.
Very few minutes,
Available they were,
For you to spend with me,
Am I not worth your time?
Sadly,
24 hours spent they were,
In sleeping, studying and daily chores.


But when forever is promised,
There never is looking back,
Or looking at the present,
The future is the goal,
The dreams that one weaves,
The life that one wishes to live,
Are all that matter.

The problems in the present rise,
But blinded they get,
Quenched they feel in drugs,
Sublime chaos,
But none roused till the awakening,
For forever means living in the mind,
In the hope,
Of a 'perfect' tomorrow.

For it was when I felt,
Disgraced,
Unwanted,
Thrown around,
Pushed,
And stripped of my respect,
That I realized,
What a simpleton I had been,
For forever was an excuse,
To push me into darkness,
To destroy my present,
Yet exalting my ego,
And stroking my pride.

Forever,
Never did exist;
For our relationship,
Never saw the light of today,
The beauty of the present,
Or utilized time we had on our hands,
To create memories for a real forever;
It was always looking forward to the light,
At the end of the tunnel..
But what if the tunnel never ends?

But end my tunnel did,
On the day I realized what your promise of forever meant,
An excuse it was,
To cheat me of today,
To rob me of the riches of the present,
Yet hallucinating me with a delusion of a future that never will exist.
 


02 August, 2012

Blogathon Post #1: The Beauty Of Uncertainty :)


I remember many years ago, when I entered the school gates for Kindergarten. I don't remember the emotions I felt or the thoughts that were running in my head, but I vaguely remember a huge revolving glass door that had 'The Westminster School' written on it in frosted glass. I remember looking around at the seniors and admiring their confidence. I remember having knots in my stomach.
I still remember the time I shifted to India. I was to enter eighth grade in a school here in Chennai. I remember how much the insects irked me, how I hated the monsoons and found the crowd to lack basic manners. I remember having a clenching feeling in my heart and the tears that I shed everyday. I missed what I felt was home to me - Dubai. I wondered if I would ever get used to Chennai, the social stigmas, the weather and the people. I often reminded myself that I was one of them, but it was utterly impossible to believe. I remember feeling like an outsider wanting to flee back home.
I remember the time I shifted schools after my tenth grade. It was sad to part ways with my old friends. I wasn't sure about making new friends and the posh environment of my new school irked me. It felt like being shifted to a huge city from a small town, where everybody knew everybody. Here, there were gossips, style, studies, competition and I felt like I would never belong. I felt like a parasite on a dog's skin.
I very clearly remember how I felt when I entered college. I felt proud of myself, like an eagle soaring the skies. I was happy to be an adult who would be responsible for her life. I was very enthusiastic to shoulder my responsibilities and outperform myself. But, deep inside, I was scared. I was scared to know that I had no one to blame if things messed up. I had nobody who would tell me I was wrong. I was scared that I would misuse my freedom. I was afraid to end up as a somebody.
I can clearly recollect how I felt when my sister was born, after experiencing thirteen years of being a single child. I look back on how I felt when I took every new step in life. I was scared to stumble. I was scared to trip, to being laughed at, in case I fell into the muck. But when I took the first step, life seemed much more beautiful than it had before. I fell into a comfort zone and experience these same feelings every time I need to do something new.

Uncertainty. I was uncertain. I was scared to expand my horizons. I was ambiguous about leaving behind my comfort zone to take a step ahead. I was hesitant, unsure where the future would lead me. I was worried about my debatable future.
Patience. Unfortunately, this is a quality that I have gone to hell and back to invest in me. I am still working on it. It doesn't exist in my DNA. But, uncertainty and patience go hand in hand. The patience to endure the unclear, the patience to hope for the best, the patience to see results and the patience to watch the beauty that uncertainty brings along unfold.
Determination. I know of people who have never grown into better people. They have avoided opportunities that life threw their way to stay in the well-rehearsed roles they had delivered before. They were determined to stagnate. Uncertainty requires people to be determined to cross the river in front of it. It grinds people, tests whether they have the skills to succeed there and then lets people flow into better scenery. Be determined to face uncertainty and watch yourself grow.
Love. Love is a powerful feeling. It is one that doesn't pamper, but creates. It makes a seed grow into a bud. It provides that initial push that every human requires to move forward. Love is love that helps one grow, face the unknown, helps push set boundaries and motivates to reach new heights.

Uncertainty has a charm that is not perceived by many. The charm of a new life, of a new setting, new happiness being delivered, potentials unleashed and new prospects opening up. The beginning and yes, taking the first step into the unsure is the most difficult. There will be hesitance, indecision, reluctance, dubiousness and second thoughts, stalling and dawdling. But beyond all these negative feelings and emotions, a wave of positivity, happiness and joy will beckon. Our standard of living and outlook towards life will rise higher. Our achievements will make us shine with pride. Self-respect increases, fear of the future decreases and life moves with a smooth flow, for we would have crossed the supposed hitch called uncertainty. :)



01 August, 2012

Goals, Dreams, Wishes, Progress. :) Analyzed and Noted!

Like the first of every month, this month too I decided to do a self check. I decided to jot down my goals and dream bigger. I decided to make a wishlist and strike off as and when I achieve what I want. But this time, I decided to share it with you! It would work as a form of extrinsic motivation for me and maybe you could follow the idea too! Together everybody achieves more, isn't it? :)

Goals:

- To resume work on my book, which I had abruptly stopped due to college routine.

- To put more effort into my studies.

- To write faster during my exams, instead of playing tug of war with my answer sheet with the invigilator!

- To take an initiative to get interested in subjects that I don't like, but need marks in.

- To save money to some extent. (I'm very bad at this!)

Dreams:

- To join a flying club ASAP. :)

Emotionally, I need to..

- Mend my stressed relationship with my best friend.

- Stop getting annoyed when things don't go my way.

- Keep in touch with my loved ones.

- Stop tit for tat when someone hurts me.

- Understand that everybody is entitled to follow their choice, no matter how close they are to me and whether I like/accept their choice or not.

I've progressed in.. :)

- Understanding that words need to be put into action and not be hollow substances that evaporate once they are said.

- Knowing that life is made up of perspectives and that it needs to be kept in mind before doing anything.

- Comprehending that happiness is not about smiling through the good times, but smiling through all odds that we face.

- Appreciating the small things that bring umpteen joy into my life.

- Knowing that everyone is entitled to living their life the way they want and that NOBODY has a right to comment on whether it is correct or not, for it is a matter of perspective.

- Understanding that what is wrong will NEVER be right, no matter how much it is justified for.

I wish..

- To get a driving license soon.

- To patch up with my best friend.

- To get awesome marks in my tests that are going on. (Did it with three subjects!)

- To control my temper and analyze the situation, before losing it. (A big step I'm taking here!)

- To blog more often!


So, what are your dreams/wishes/goals for the month that has started? What did you achieve last month that you feel proud about?

Happy August Lovelies! :)


P.S: I'm going to do an August blogathon! I will be blogging on various topics every single day of this month! :) I'm sure it's going to wear me out and I'm afraid that I might skip a day or two, but I want to give this a shot! :) Looking forward to your comments and feel free to join me in the same if you are interested!! :)