20 July, 2014

Almost A Goodbye. {Suicide}

Eight paracetamols I took, all in the hope that it would end. Hoping that I would finally find peace and that all my sorrows would diminish.

I didn't leave a note, for nothing remained to be said. I didn't tie up loose ends, for I knew the world would move on without me.

I just wanted to transcend above and beyond, out of reach.

I woke up to the glaring light, which was blinding my eyes. Is this how heaven is supposed to look? Loud cries could be heard, some in pain and some exhaled in joy. I couldn't fathom what was happening till I heard, "You're safe and stable now."

The hospital.

Safe? I smirked.
I cursed my fate.
Safe was what I wanted. 
Stable is what I will never be.

I fumbled for an answer to the pain and wondered why it all did not end. Why I was not annihilated off the face of this planet. I cussed the soul that had saved me. The truth was, I was beyond saving. Now I was forced to live this doomed existence till death decided to play its part.. again.


  1. why such a depressing post? it's deep but a little bit disturbing too!

  2. Why such a negative post? :(

  3. Grate excellent post. nice work

  4. this post reminds me of the last episode of Satyamev jayate where Amir Khan interviewed two suicide survivors. A nicely written and touching post.

  5. Hi AaeKay. Apologies for this late comment, but I was just blog-hopping today and came to check out your blog. I hope you're out of that phase now. :)

    A big hug to you! Whatever that is, I wish you feel happy again. Sending across lots of love and best wishes. :)

    1. Thank you Ashna :) I'm absolutely good now. Hugs!

  6. Sometimes we have such kind of feeling to be away for mthis worls but fate wont let that happen.